Many years ago, I knew two young men who were discerning a call to priesthood. Both decided to test their vocations by entering different religious orders. Unlike a diocesan priesthood, each order would eventually call the men to a vow of poverty.
I mention "poverty" because it relates to my observations of them, both great guys, as they prepared to enter religious life.
One of them was very thrifty. Before he entered, he methodically sold his possessions at garage sales. He really wouldn't need the money, I thought, going off on this pilgrimage of renunciation. But maybe he was hedging his bets.
The other guy gave everything away. He had accumulated a lot of quality clothing when he worked for a haberdasher during college. He distributed it all to cousins and friends. It didn't seem to occur to him --- or he didn't care --- that if he didn't stay, he could use some of those possessions later. My 16-year-old brother was visiting me at the time, and this friend handed him a pair of fine shoes.
"Wow," my baby brother said, "this has been a great trip." He didn't have much money and those shoes were a big deal to him.
Well, as it turned out, neither of the young men became priests. Both of them went on to marry and raise fine families. Luckily for me, one of them, the one who gave his fashionable clothes away, became my husband.
I share this memory because the attitudes people bring to money and possessions are such a fascinating part of who they are.
What makes us thrifty, sometimes to the point of hoarding, and what makes us open-handed?
CBS News recently reported on a study that purports to show that people who spend money on others are happier than people who spend money on themselves.
Of course, as Christians, this shouldn't surprise us. Christ called us to serve others and he assured us that the poor in spirit were blessed. True happiness follows the way of generosity and renunciation. At least that's what we aspire to.
Still, it's tough to conquer our inherent desire for security and possessions.
My mother, a child of the Great Depression who saw her father lose his farm to creditors, was unable to overcome her need to hang on to money, although she was far more generous with her children than with herself.
Being truly my mother's daughter, I can identify with the friend who had the garage sales. I know he's a devoted Catholic, and I'm sure he's generous with time and money. But I bet he calculates it well, watches every penny and keeps the receipts for his taxes.
I can identify with all of that. Meanwhile, there are nights I lie awake worrying about finances while the man who shares my bed mutters "it's only money" and falls asleep.
Do we become happier because we give? Or do happier people give more?
Regardless of the answer, and regardless of the attitudes about money we grew up with, our faith calls us to constantly challenge ourselves to give more.
And if the end result of doing that is happiness, how can we go wrong? giving, poverty, money, possessions, the poor, generosity, |