One of the more vexing situations that I have encountered in working with candidates who are discerning a possible vocation to the priesthood is the amount of time it requires for them to decide whether or not to enter the seminary. It is not uncommon for men to take five years or more to determine their path.
In my first year as vocation director, I couldn't figure out what was the problem. I so wanted to shout: "Fish or cut bait!" But I was making a common mistake, projecting my seminary discernment, formation and the questions that confronted me into their situation.
I, as did many men of my generation, entered the seminary in high school at age 13; others entered seminary college at age 18. I was ordained at age 25. The issues that confronted me were those of celibacy, the desire to be certain that the priesthood was God's path for me, and concerns with my relative worldly inexperience. I wasn't worried about car payments, health insurance, retirement or my 401K. I carried no mortgage, had no dependent children; I didn't even own a credit card!
In contrast, the average age of today's seminarian is 32, the average ordination age being 36. It is not uncommon for men to be ordained even later, well into their 40s. What does all this mean in terms of discernment? It means that the issues facing the average man considering the seminary are fundamentally different than those that confronted me and many other clergy years ago. Today's men have a much different set of questions. In my conversations with them, three main areas emerge which strongly challenge them.
1. Financial Concerns: As they are older, many of the men are deeply involved in their careers, and carry with themselves various financial obligations. What to do about car payments, mortgage, health insurance, retirement plans and investment portfolios are some of the questions that they face. It is not a question of greed or a hesitancy concerning poverty. Rather, being older, they are staring realistically at a tough issue:
"Can I bring to an end all that I have pursued, sell the condo, quit my job, enter the seminary, and then make the emotional adjustments to community living, beginning a rigorous academic and spiritual formation for the next seven to 10 years, all of this with no absolute certainty that I will be ordained? If in the seminary I decide that the priesthood is not my path, what will become of me? No job, no house, no income, no health benefits?"
It is an issue that takes time to resolve.
2. Prior Relationships: Interestingly enough, many if not most of older candidates have come to terms with celibacy in their lives, and they embrace it peacefully. It is not seen as the stumbling block it was for previous generations or still is for younger candidates.
However, after 30 plus years of life, men have been in relationships, some romantic, some that have led to marriage, and some that have resulted in the birth of children. Men who are divorced and have received an annulment are able to apply for the seminary, but there may be issues that remain long after the marriage has ended. Is the previous relationship settled? Are there continuing legal difficulties? Is the candidate healed from the divorce? And were there children born of the relationship?
Our church clearly expects that men with dependent children forego any thought of seminary and dedicate themselves to the care of their children. But even after children are grown, a father's responsibility does not come to an end. How that responsibility is to be lived out takes great care in discerning.
Furthermore, some candidates care for elderly parents, or send money home to help with family expenses. "What will happen to my family if the money is not there? Who will take care of Mom, now that Dad has died?" All these questions take time.
3. Education: Some men have a bachelor's degree; others do not or have had a year or two of college. They may find themselves at age 32 or 35 needing to re-enter the academic world and wondering, "Can I do it? Can I return to college for two or three years, then on to theology, for five to seven more? Can I get my head back into the books? Am I smart enough?"
I am happy to relate that St. John Seminary in Camarillo does a wonderful job assisting men to succeed academically and provides a very supportive environment. Nevertheless, graduate level study is a challenge for anyone who has been out of school for years. And that decision takes time.
You would think that no one in his right mind would ever run the tremendous risk of leaving it all behind and entering the seminary. What is remarkable is that so many do. I will tell you of just two of the men who entered this past year.
One was a very successful lawyer with a lucrative practice. When I asked what motivated him to consider the priesthood, his response was immediate. There was no longer any energy or joy in the work he had, not when compared to the life he experienced while working in his parish. Ministry gave him life. For him, the decision was an obvious one that he eagerly pursued.
Another new seminarian was the regional manager for a nationwide food chain. Prior to entering the seminary, his employer, in a last-ditch effort to hold him, offered him a position earning well over $100,000 a year. No small sacrifice to walk away from that kind of offer, but he did.
And why? Because he could clearly see where his heart, his passion and his God were leading him. He walked away from the job and into the seminary.
It may take time for such men to discern the path. But we as an archdiocese are blessed to have them, they who can hear Jesus in their life calling them to "sell all that you have and come follow me." They may be older, and their age might surprise us, but they will bring with them to the priesthood a depth of experience and wisdom that previous generations of priests could not know. Father James Forsen is director of the archdiocesan Office for Vocations. |