"Human life and death are thus in the hands of God…But God does not exercise this power in an arbitrary and threatening way, but rather as part of his care and loving concern for his creatures."

-Evangelium Vitae, No. 39 as quoted by Bishop Gerald Wilkerson in his welcome letter on www.embracingourdying.com.

In reality, life and death are always but a breath apart --- yet we may be unprepared and overwhelmed when it comes into our own lives. However, if we but look higher, we can see that God's hand is near to steady us in times of fear, uncertainty and worry.

We can find solace in our Catholic teachings and traditions and through the ministry of our Catholic clergy. We can find comfort through the service of hospice or palliative (comfort) care professionals.

After decades working as a hospice nurse, I, too, was faced with an impending death in my own family. My father, who lived in Minnesota, was diagnosed with a fatal illness. I had lost my mother to cancer while I was in college and it was painful to consider myself --- even as an adult --- becoming an orphan.

Ironically yet wonderfully, my father chose to be cared for by the hospice for which I had first worked as a hospice nurse. Despite the fact he wanted to live much longer, he accepted the fact that God had other plans for him.

My father had simple wishes as his days with us dwindled. He wanted to receive Eucharist as often as possible (the only nourishment that mattered any longer) and to receive the sacraments before he was too sick to be aware. He wanted to remain at home with his wife, in his own room, surrounded by his family. We worked with his hospice team making the plans necessary to grant his heart's desires.

My brother and I were present at his bedside as he approached his death. My father spoke about his life --- sharing his reflections with both his family and the Catholic priest which the hospice had provided for us. He sought the priest's assurance that he had acted wisely in planning for his wife's needs and that he had done all he could to prepare his soul for his final journey.

We were blessed to share in the beautiful sacrament of healing administered by the priest at the end of his life. Following his death, the church afforded us the ritual of gathering and honoring his life through the funeral Mass. The memories of these sacraments and rituals have stayed with as healing medicine for the wound of his absence.

I am telling you this story for the reason that it demonstrates a "good" death. It was "good" because our family chose to use the services of hospice and to fully participate in our beloved Catholic rituals.

I would wish the same for all Catholics who are facing end-of-life decisions. I find myself recommending to my patients and I recommend to you a website, www.embracingourdying.com, a wonderful end-of-life resource provided by the Catholic Bishops of California.

The name "Embracing Our Dying" means both that as Catholics we ought to "embrace" the idea of dying in Christ when God has willed it and that we as Catholics ought to "embrace" those who are dying --- offering them our presence and our comfort and solace.

The website offers theological, medical and legal perspectives on death and dying, end-of-life issues and hospice ministry. Included are important Church documents and articles about Catholic teaching, an explanation of hospice care and how to access it, downloadable advance directives and answers to frequently asked questions (FAQs) about the end of life.

If you or your family are facing end-of-life issues and want to reaffirm your understanding of our Church's teachings or to find a parish or a hospice facility, I urge you to visit the website, www.embracingourdying.com.

Liz Sumner, who received her B.S. in Nursing from Marquette University, is a Palliative Care Coordinator for The Elizabeth Hospice, Escondido; contributing editor for the Embracing Our Dying website, and a published author and national lecturer. She will also be a workshop presenter at the Archdiocese of Los Angeles' 2007 Religious Education Congress in March.