The older I get, the more I wonder about what kind of difference my life is making in the world.

I try to be a good husband, a good father, and a good employee. I try to be involved in my parish and in the wider community. I haven't really done anything that remarkable with my life, but I hope that if the opportunity arises in which I can do something extraordinary, I will be ready to take that opportunity. I want to be a good person, and to lead a good life.

In today's Gospel reading, Jesus uses the analogy of a grape vine and its branches to describe what our relationship with him is to be like. "I am the vine, you are the branches," Jesus says. "Whoever remains in me and I in him will bear much fruit,

because without me you can do nothing."

This passage tells us something very emphatically: that if we try and lead a "good" life, it must be rooted in some way in God. We are dependent on Jesus for life, of course, but we are also dependent on Jesus for our lives to matter. If we remain attached to Jesus Christ, our lives will bear much fruit.

"Without me you can do nothing." This is a powerful statement. Jesus does not say "Without me you can do a lot of good things, but they would be even better if you were with me." He doesn't say, "Without me you can do a little." Jesus says that without him we can do nothing.

I go about most of my life reflexively, certainly without much conscious thought or intentions regarding Jesus Christ. I wake up in the morning, and just like when the doctor taps your knee, I start my routine. Work. Kids' homework. Errands. Chores. Meals. Finally, sleep. Even if I do some work for a non-profit or our parish, I often do even those "good deeds" without much conscious attempt to root these activities in God.

What am I trying to accomplish? What am I actually accomplishing? I rarely stop to ask these questions. I want to lead a good life. This passage raises the question whether it is possible to lead a good life without God.

It may be possible. I'm not a theologian or a philosopher. But I am a Christian, and I claim to want to share God's love in this world. How am I going to do that if I do not, for example, pray for the people I am speaking to at church, or if I do not look for the opportunity to help a co-worker, or if I do not seek ways to teach my children about God in more than just superficial ways?

Even though I live in the Napa Valley, I don't know a lot about grape growing. But you don't have to be an agriculture expert to understand that a branch of any kind of plant is not going to live very long or very well if it is separated from the plant itself. Jesus asks us to "remain in me" for our own life and health, suggesting that if we want to live in a way that makes a difference to us and to others, we must remain connected to him in a meaningful way.

Bill Peatman writes from Napa.