You've probably heard the term "Cafeteria Catholics" used to describe many Catholics in the United States. It's meant to describe those of us who tend to pick and choose the things we want to take seriously in our church, and ignore the aspects of church teaching that we disagree with or that make us uncomfortable.

We might love Sunday Mass, for example, but balk at Reconciliation. We might advocate for social justice, but keep quiet about adherence to church teaching on birth control.

In today's Gospel reading, Jesus is questioned as to why his disciples do not fast like the traditional Jews. "Can the wedding guests fast while the bridegroom is with them?" Jesus asks. "As long as they have the bridegroom with them they cannot fast."

Of course, none of us would fast or perform some kind of ritual asceticism at a wedding. Jesus seems to be saying that since the purpose of fasting is to draw closer to God, such ritual denial is unnecessary in his presence.

"No one sews a piece of unshrunken cloth on an old cloak," Jesus continues. "If he does, its fullness pulls away, the new from the old, and the tear gets worse. No one pours new wine into old wineskins. Otherwise, the wine will burst the skins, and both the wine and the skins are ruined. Rather, new wine is poured into fresh wineskins."

One again Jesus is indicating to his followers that his mission is the transformation of our world, our communities, and our lives. He is not offering to fine-tune our lives in certain areas --- say to improve our worship but ignore our service. We see over and over in the Gospels that their challenge and promise is not lifestyle modification but spiritual conversion. We are to become something completely new.

If you're like me, this is attractive but hard to hear. I mean, I don't like to change anything too much or too fast in my life. I am not just a Cafeteria Catholic --- following Jesus Christ when it is convenient --- I am a Cafeteria Human. I want to change as little as possible, resisting especially hard when something requires real, heart-wrenching, life-altering change. Jesus suggests that we cannot adopt a patchwork faith, changing our lives a tiny fraction at a time, hoping to hang on to as much of our previous lives as possible.

New wine is for new wineskins. We are called to fully embrace the Gospel of Jesus Christ, and to surrender to the transformation that he promises us. I realize as I read this Gospel that my tendency is to sew patches on an old coat, trying to keep my life, my faith and my relationships whole while resisting the deep, spiritual, emotional change required to be the person I want to be, and to be the person God calls me to be.

Jesus calls us to surrender to his love. Unfortunately for us, there is no such thing as a partial surrender. The promise held out before us, however, is spectacular. We are offered a new life --- one that does not need patching and sewing, but one that will be forever whole.

Bill Peatman writes from Napa.